OK this is hard for me to write cause I feel like I'm being selfish, but I have a question that I'm wondering if anyone else is struggling with.
Background: My husband and I have been together for 6 years married for 2. He has been hospitalized 14 times since our marriage for alcohol related health issues. And has been a nightmare for the past two years. I'm sure I don't have to go into specifics as that part is not unique.
He has a daughter from a previous relationship who is 19 years old, has her own car, own job and has started college, she lives about 90 minutes away. She NEVER came to see him while he was in the hospital. The only time in the past year that she did come to see him was on Father's Day.
Well fast-forward, I told my husband he had to go to rehab or we were done. He went inpatient rehab for 40 days. He got home 2 weeks ago, and so far so good....still expecting the worst but praying for the best and so far things have been really good (honeymoon period I'm sure).
So here's the question. He drives down to see his daughter today, and tells me that he wanted to go today cause she was off and he didn't want to spend the weekend away from me. I said thanks I appreciate it, and he says "I'm sure my daughter would appreciate me spending time with her too. "
She's 19, she has two jobs and goes to school, she has her friends and her social life. She is a great kid. And I have no problem with him spending time with her. I do have a problem with the fact that she couldn't be bothered to come up and see him for the past year while he was literally dying. She has always lived with her mother. He talks to her daily, but hasn't lived with her in 10 years, way before I came into the picture.
He stated that he is conflicted about wether to spend time with her or with me.
Ummm I'm the one that has been dealing with this front row center for the past two years, I'm the one that has been wiping your ass and your tears, I'm the one that goes to work everyday to pay for the roof over your head and the health insurance that has kept you alive. Me, all me!
Our marriage is the thing that needs to be repaired.
The other part is there is nothing from stopping her butt from getting in her car and driving her ass up to spend the weekend with him. In OUR house as part of OUR family.
I guess I'm venting, and I guess I'm being selfish, but I'm pissed. He would have a stroke if I left him at home for the day so that I could spend the day with my kids. But god forbid I say anything about the "golden child who walks on water".
