Yes, yes yes I know what you are going through.
My sober (albeit suspecting relapse) AH and I have a limited sex life. he has no physical issues in that dept. His history prior to becoming sober was.....well, I probably don't want to know his number I am sure it is in the hundreds maybe more than that.
What does he tell me - he has no sex drive. I wouldn't expect a 50 year old to have that of a 30 but this is ridiculous.
He also tells me he loved having sex when he was drunk, drunk and cocaine was his favorite. While recently trying to talk me into buying into the "I would like to try to drink again and I think I can with no issues" conversation he said one of the reasons was because he thought it would help our sex life.
After he got sober I have seen in his medical records that he was having impotency issues for a while. Not now.
Anyway I just think he is uncomfortable. I don't know how else to explain it. Its good when we do but clearly causes him anxiety beforehand. Wants to lower those inhibitions and can't.
Personally I enjoy the lead up with a glass of wine it definitely can help me get in the mood but I don't like sex while DRUNK. I'd rather eat a pizza or go to sleep then again I don't need alcohol to lower my inhibitions in that department.