My First Al-Anon Meeting?
So today I went to my first Al-Anon meeting. Or so I thought.
There is a building specifically for this stuff by my house. I went into the wrong room, it turned out to be AA instead.
So I stayed. Why not? A guy I work with was there, and I was nervous as hell. So I stayed, listened, did all that stuff. The topic was Step 1.
Now I wonder if I may have an alcohol problem. I know I have an anger problem, I get mad and drink. Due to the issues these past few weeks, I have been always angry, and therefore, always drunk. Everything bad that has happened in my life (not EVERYthing, but a lot) has happened when I was drunk. Therefore it would not have happened had I been sober. I continue to drink anyway, knowing the consequences.
I have been sober for 18 days. Friday, 9/28/12, I woke up shaking, and scared the living $hit out of me because all I could think of was turning into the ABF. I ALWAYS drink to get drunk, and I NEVER know how or when to stop.
I am not asking you guys if you think I have a problem. I think I do, or at the very least, I will if I don't get this under control.
I really am not trying to label myself as an alcoholic, I have all kinds of labels on me already, and another one will probably break me.
I was doing this to find a home group. Now it's something else entirely.
There is another meeting tomorrow night. I am going. I will eventually make sure I get to the Al-Anon meeting, though.