I was an "ideal" child; captain of the debate team, a member of the NFL (Natl. Forensics League), I did extemp, oratory, was in the Natl. Honor Society, etc. All the way up til graduation I refused to try alcohol at all. My fear was that alcohol leads to loss of self control, which I held to be paramount to a rational person. But I decided that at 18, the age at which I could serve in the military or get married, I was mature enough to try it.
Sadly, there was a brief romance where I used it before it began to use me. Alcohol has insinuated itself, in some degree, into every action and situation I've been in since then.
I don't know what to make of this now. I have no cravings, no withdrawals, no DT's...mostly just a strange sense of peace that I may have finally regained control of myself. If I stay away from drinking and overcome the Addictive Voice, my actions will be by my own again.
Biggest surprise to me is how boring my life is! :rotfxko I've thought I've been incredibly busy for the last few years with work and school. The truth is you just don't manage to get much done when you're drunk.