I do think that many of us turn to "travel guides" or "tour guides" of sorts (qualified or not) in our search for answers on this. We slowly build a patchwork in our heads, some knowing from the get-go what that quilt is going to look or feel like while others have no idea until it's closer to completion or completed.
For some the patches may come from reading books, information or posts about alcoholism, addictions, relationships, marriage, infidelity, divorce, parenting, psychology, religion or even motivational articles about someone they want to become or something they would like to do which is not somehow possible given their current situation. For others, the quilt may be assembled by talking to old or new friends, parents, siblings, children, neighbor, a Higher Power, a pastor/rabbi/priest, a psychiatrist, psychologist, counselor, social worker, teacher, couple, or even hearing someone speak on TV, a movie or whatnot. For yet others, it's about experiences, occurrences, incidents and patterns.
We take a little of this, add a little of that, sprinkle here and there, flavor with spices, add some color, check the texture, stew over this but simmer on that ... and we end up with our own recipe. I don't think that having great sources to look to for different kinds of recipes and the methods and ingredients that go into cooking them makes one a poor chef. I think that's what can make for a better chef and a better course.