I have been sober quite a few years, but I was a "highly functional alcoholic" with all sorts of stuff and a great career. I didn't lose control, until I lost control. As for the wives that knew I was pretty much all right, but did have a problem. They are now EX-WIVES. I am sure they can tell you how that worked out.
Life is great now, but it didn't happen until I DECIDED TO GET SOBER FOR ME. Those around me get the benefit now, but they got all the problems then.
Tell her to call for Sushi when she is sober and wants to eat raw fish.
Best of luck,
Jon