It is not bad of you to think. It is you being smart. It is you taking care of yourself. If that does happen you won't be at square one. You'll hopefully have a job or your resume will be complete and out there, you'll have more therapy/self awareness under your belt, you will have a larger emergency fund, you can explore schooling options for your son etc. Can you give yourself a short break from trying to decide if you should stay or go or if he 'gets it' or if he doesn't? You've been fighting with yourself for a long time and the decision is no closer and now you have this new development. It is OK to just table the decision for right now. You are stuck there. What if you just put all your energy into crossing all those other things off your action list. Independence has great personal benefits no matter what direction your life takes.