First of all, I am happy to hear you found others to support you in your time of need. your A can't be that person for you - regardless of what excuse he made and whether or not its true.
I have a dear long-time friend who is a serious A, and she flat out admits these days that she is a horrible friend. No more excuses. No more lies. Just "I am a drunk and I am a horrible friend". It's refreshing in its honesty! ; ) And I always know what to expect (nothing) so when something does happen I am pleasantly surprised.
So you don't feel compassion or detachment...that's ok. Just go with that for now - keep your distance - and allow yourself to be mad, disappointed, whatever it is you are feeling. But know you basically went to the hardware store for bread, and set yourself up for it by thinking this time may be different. I know that tended to make me maddest of all...at myself.
Prayers all is ok in your life now - and hugs from me,
~T