I wonder if staying on track and keeping my eyes on the road will get easier the longer I do it?
Yes it does get easier. I used the hula hoop imagery a lot in the beginning. Picture those hoops. Are his plates and salt/pepper in his hoop or yours? His! Then I would force myself to see something that was in my hoop and try and keep my focus on that. If he has a tantrum over something is that tantrum in his hoop or yours? His! Stay the heck out of his hoop. It is unhealthy, disrespectful, dangerous, and conceited to go mucking around in other people's hoops!
I call it a tantrum for a reason. a) it is pretty darn accurate and b) I had to do something to stay away from pity because that let do compassion (even if misplaced) and that led to me spending all my time in his hoop figuring out his problems and my boundaries would come crumbling down - insert confusion and fog.
Originally Posted by
hydrogirl 
Oh, MamaKit.....he's a big boy now! He can buy paper plates if he has to. I'm sure his dinners will consist of take-out primarily, but that's OK.
Try not to 'awfulize' about what may or may not happen. Your boys will be supervised, and they will get to spend time with him--and you won't have to!
It does get easier with time and practice. Be kind to yourself today!
Good post!
It really does get easier.