AA's big book, Alcoholics Anonymous, describes alcoholics as "self-will run riot". They suffer from self-absorption, low self-esteem combined with enormous ego, selfishness and self-destructiveness. When someone gets sober, the 12 Steps can make a huge difference in the mindset of someone who previously thought the world revolved around them. It takes hard work and investment of many years. "You can't turn a pickle back into a cucumber." Add to that, when in active alcoholism the bottle is their higher power, God, love of their life, exclusive relationship.