Originally Posted by
MrsDragon 
and I was concerned that just our admitting that we know, and discussing our feelings with him regarding this would make him pull away.
I think the moment we start trying to control his life, nag him about using cocaine, telling him about various treatments, having that look of pity and sadness on our faces; it would make him uncomfortable and we would slowly start to see him drift further away.
Hi MrsDragon thanks for your post... reading your post reminds me so much of me and my sister. H (he is not my husband but a darling friend of over 15 years - whom I became intimately involved with about 7 years ago - so we have known each other and have been so close for many years) and who is a very close friend of my sisters - when we first suspected (heard the rumours) that he was using cocaine - we decided not to judge / not to comment / to ignore what we had heard / to treat him as we always did... so not to 'chase' him away - so that he knew he could always come to us in his 'hour of need'. But isn't this considered 'enabling'???
Such a tough one!!! I took this approach with H's coke addiction for years - we were alway so very close - but recently his behaviour has impacted to greatly on me - and I have had to go 'no contact'. It is devastating for me - but I need to protect my own sanity!
