It is a blessing I have never talked to anyone else about this disease. To me it is routine and i can not think about breaking from the routine. I embraced this disease a long time ago and I am afraid to let it go now, funny how things change. Not so long ago I lived for the weekend to have a few beers and a few drinks wow that I would give anything to go back and change. I think what is going round in my head now is how do i go to my doctor (who just happens to be a guy i went to school with) and what I will do to escape the overall emptyness which alcohol fills up