Gracey,
You're doing the right thing. Get the advice of someone who knows the law - which is not your H. As Peaches pointed out, everything he hurled at you had nothing to do with you. What you said to him, was about him. And that smacked him right between the eyes!
I can only say from my experience that the As in my life have never given their permission for me to make the changes that I needed to be healthy. I expect you will deal with the same from your H. Bottom line is that he doesn't have to agree with your feelings. They are your's to have and express if you choose to and anything he says about them holds no water. You feel the way you feel, whether he agrees or not. That's called life.
You keep the focus on the healthy aspects of your life, and let the ducks quack their heads off. You're setting good examples for your children which will be a powerful legacy to leave behind. Compare that to a legacy of beer bottles....
Peace,
Petunia