To me the addictive voice is not about the urges, but the more subtle lies and flawed ways of thinking that tend to come with them.
I've caught myself setting up complex situations that will lead back to relapse in a sneaky and unnoticed way, and I don't feel like I do it consciously. Am I going to see old friends to hang out? Or am I doing it just to put myself in close proximity to dealers and people who will make me feel like it's okay to start using again?
Such scandalous acts must be uncovered and brought to attention.
"I can go over there, I am in control now and won't use."
Wrong.
"I overreacted last time, people are right, I'm too sensitive, I don't really have a problem."
Wrong.
"I wonder if they need a ride to work today, I'll call them and ask to be nice."
Really? I never gave half a damn before, why do I care now? Because a nice gesture will put me right in place to ask to buy drugs.
I have to get into the mindset that someone is actively waiting to trip me up and deceive me, this is the addictive voice, I have to be ready at any time and I must always be honest with myself and decide if my actions are for me or for the addiction.