For the last 4 months I have attended group therapy (specifically related to dependency issues). The thing that struck me the most is the concept of surrender. You can keep fighting it, or you can surrender and figure out how to move forward. Having said that, I still struggle with the word "never", as in "never having a glass of wine again with dinner". For me personally, I quit using the word "never". I replaced it with "now". The further I get along (it hasn't been quite 5 months yet), the less I worry about "never" and the more I appreciate every morning that I wake up without a headache.
Right now I'm surrendering...I don't want what I had. I'm scared of the future, but I read here daily that the future can be very bright. I've read here a lot that you won't stop until you're ready. And only you can know that. I believe that is true as well. When I quit, I was ready. My way wasn't getting me anywhere. It's not all roses (yet) on this side either, but it's still a lot better than it was.
You can do this if you're ready!