tjp, I agree with what everyone has said here. You are definitely NOT a bad mom, you've just hit you saturation point with your son. You know what you are likely to hear from him at this point because you know what he's going through, and you know what he says and does when he's going through this. What do you think about maybe sending him a short note letting him know that you love him and are praying for him, but that given everything that's happened, you just can't talk to him right now? Might make you feel better while still giving you the distance that you need from your son.