Sweetie, I think you are doing amazing. I knew about the stages of grief, but I had NO idea that I would flip-flop between the various stages and when my mom died, dad and I would be at different stages. He would want to talk about it what happened in the ER when she died (not drug related) and I couldn't handle hearing that more than once. It was okay - he had other people to talk to, as did I.
After my XABF#3 died, we had been apart for a couple of years. It had been a while, probably months, but I was having a really good day. I "talk" to him in my head. I told him "I'm going to tuck you in my heart, so you can see how good life is in recovery". Okay, I had a little crying spell but not for long.
I am so grateful for your posts. There's been so much sadness, here, especially the last week and I'm hoping it helps you to post, and I KNOW it helps many others.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy