The hardest part is getting ourselves there the first few times.....no matter who the addict in our life is. There are several young people who come to our meetings with bf or gf who is addicted. They are accepted and embraced. No one preaches at them to leave the relationship. When we talk about letting go.....that doesn't mean leaving the addict. It means detaching. Very very different concepts that can easily be misinterpreted.
It took me a long time to "get it". I just kept going until things that didn't make sense started to make sense. I would struggle with something until I figured it out. I'm a slow learner but hope to continue my journey toward self awareness for the rest of my life. For me, Nar-Anon and Al-Anon have been instrumental in that process.
gentle hugs
ke