So sorry to hear what you're going through. I'm not married or have kids...me and my AF are engaged. I have been to that happy magical everything is going to be ok land that you speak of! It was really great there...couldn't have been any better. Have actually been there a good bit but the horror always seems to find its way back. So sad. I did laugh at ur last post and by NO MEANS is your situation funny but like how you had distraction during the (I'm sure you knew it was going to be pointless) discussion you had. I'll have to try that some time! And I laugh with you to a point too because I sit there and think of how they are and if you don't make a joke of some things it does get ya in the end. I've moved past the crying, I'm sorry, he's sorry, I love you, it will get better phase and now I'm just angry and bitter. It's so hard not to be this way towards him but I just try to avoid him as much as possible and do my own thing. His days are numbered and soon, very soon I hope it just to be me and my girls (3 dogs) moving forward in life. I'm in my mid 30's and want to be with someone who is aware of a world outside of drugs and addict behavior. Someone I can trust and rely on. Best of luck to you!