The one liner THAT always works for me when I want to push 25 into 12 is
Do I want to be right or be happy!.
I used to need to be right no matter what. Today, thank you alanon, I have tools that work for me. One liners I can remember when the chaos starts and the committee in my head starts driving me to insanity. For me it is insanity for me to get into someone else's business. They will either drink or not. Use or not and I must only be responsible for my life one minute at a time. If I extending energy into proving I am right when all I am really doing is making someone else defensive, that is time and energy I am not putting into my life.
I hope that makes sense. I hope you celebrate your new insight and write it in your journal if you keep one. It's so neat to go back and re-read about baby steps. Because for me recovery is always baby steps.