Vale, I guess the last part of what you said
*If only she had faced her demons instead of hiding from them with oxy.I don't
know if she would have won or lost---but at least she'd have the dignity of either
killing her demons or leaving the mother%&@%$#s with some choice scars
......to remember her by...*
My first A...(I married him), some bad things happened and eventually he acted like he was going to hit me...and I left...months later he killed himself and it was so senseless and I couldn't help but feel that If if i had stayed it wouldn't have happened. And he was a fighty belligerent guy. But the heroin got him so hard. I guess after he killed himself, I just blamed myself and told myself that if I had been better, more understanding, if I had been perfect it wouldn't have happened. If I had been more commanding, more direct, more crazy instead of being a pushover and just going along. I know now it wasn't my fault, but what you said, it shot through me.