I am going to post this as a new thread, and I have no idea where you stand on religion, but I am an alcoholic and am a secular humanist. Therefore, the AA model does not work for me. Instead, I am joined a group called SOS, Secular Organization for Sobriety, or Save Our Selves. I've found relief from the guilt and self-loathing that some feel with AA. Please do not get me wrong, I know MANY people who have benifited from AA and that is wonderful, but there is something else out there. The SOS philosophy borrows heavily from AA, but the higher power is not a religious one and it actually empowers you. I AM powerless against the EFFECTS of alcohol on my body. I am not, however, powerless against the call of drink.
If you're interested please Google Secular Organizations for Sobriety. There will be a meeting somewhere close to you.
Peace~