Hi there, I realize you posted this a while back, and I hope that things have improved with your family since then.
There is a book that came to mind as I read your post called The Peacemaker by Ken Sande. Also, Focus on the Family, an organization I work with, has an article series on their website that addresses family conflict. I hope you'll check it out (sorry, I'm unable to include links).
I pray that you will continue you on your journey to sobriety, and that you'll find healing in your relationships with your family members. Blessings to you!