My AH had a doozie - maybe one of the most original I've heard.
He was drinking, messed up his new iPhone, handed it to me, said
"fix it". I took it and up popped a text from an internet prostitute, saying unmentionable things. I must have looked shocked, and AH grabbed the phone from me. "What is going on?" I said.
"You just TOOK my phone from me. That was illegal search and seizure. So anything you learned was fruit of the poisoned search, and you are NOT ALLOWED to say anything about it."
BothSidesNow