Beetle53

So, I'm on day 10...woah! I hadn't been counting for the last coupla' days- so that sounds huge. I can't lie- I've been making it by the skin of my teeth for the last two days. You know how when you start something out, you're all jazzed and out to conquer the world? That sh*t don't last. LMAO

I've been kinda' aggro and just doing my best to meditate and do my yoga, breathe, eat well. But I just feel so GRRRR!!! Booze mellows me out... So obviously, I have some pent up frustration or anger or something. The feeling has been like I just want to pop off!! I want to just scream F**K THIS gimme a freakin' DRINK for god's sake!!!!! It's very rebellious in a way. And I'm afraid of those feelings, I'm not comfortable expressing anger or negative emotions- other than sadness really.

So last night I went out and got an 80lb punching bag and some pink fingerless practice gloves. I made a playlist with super aggressive music. When I woke up this morning- I strapped on my gloves, jumped on my elliptical and went to WORK, played my crazy music, jumped off my elliptical, and just pounded the bag until I was completely out of gas. I was punching and yelling, just getting all my crazy out! It was INCREDIBLE!!!!! I can't tell you how much BETTER I feel. Is that messed up?? LOL I'm not into violence at ALL. I've never done anything like that. So primal.. LMAO I have a feeling that bag is going to get a LOT of use. ;-)

I can't get to the level of zen that I want if I'm not letting this stuff out, I don't think. Anyone else aggro in the beginning? How did you handle it??