cb12

The older I get the more I realize just how complex humans are and how relationships make things at least twice as complicated, if not more.

I dated a guy last summer, M, who is a fabulous man, a hard worker, and very generous. He and I broke up because he was leaving for work for 6 months and neither of us wanted a long distance relationship. I met him at the summer camp I worked at.

At this same camp, I met a woman and friend of mine, D, who was my summer camp roommate for 3 summers and we get along great. She is married and I've met her husband a few times.

D and M know eachother, as aquaintances through camp and I am the mutual friend between them. D and her husband want a child, but her husband is sterile. 2 weeks ago at summer camp, D was explaining her situation and noted that they were looking into artificial insemination. M immediately volunteered to donate. This is a man who has never wanted children and I doubt he will ever change his mind. They are signing paperwork next week.

D and I will be working on a committee together over the next year. If she gets pregnant with M's biological child... That's gonna hurt. A lot.
I have trouble moving on once romantic relationships end and I was making real progress "moving on" from M. But now, I have taken what feels like 10 steps backwards and it feels so complicated. It feels like a betrayal, it feels weird, it feels just wrong. I want D to have a child, but I never expected it would an intentional set up by M and D.

There is absolutely nothing I can do about this. It has very little to do with me and I am the one who hasn't moved on from a month and a half relationship that ended a year ago. I could use some words of ES&H about now. I would greatly appreciate it.