Divorce never entered my head but I knew that I couldnt live with an active alcoholic anymore, not after 23yrs of the same.
After several months of therapy and a few things that my therapist said that seemed to sink in, one important one being, when we were discussing about what upsets me the most, is when my AH is putting down our daughters and she said 'of course, thats because they are very important to you, but you are important too'. I thought about that for a quite a while after and started to see myself as an important person - his wife, the mother of his children and ME! and I wasnt being treated as such.
Around this time too, I went to see the doctor, who spelled it out, that my health was suffering. I was overweight, with high colestorol, daily stress symptons and anxiety. I cried on the way home, thinking my husbands active alcoholism could end up killing me! I seriously thought I could end up suffering a stroke or heart attack at an early age. By the time I got home, I told him that I was leaving him and a few weeks later, I did. The best descision I have ever made.