Hello, and Welcome.
What jumped out at me in your above post; "I am a fixer". At one point I thought I was a "fixer", The disease of alcoholism does not come with a repair manual. It is a very personal journey for those who are addicted, and you CANNOT help the alcoholic achieve sobriety.
I can only encourage you to educate yourself regarding addiction. It was the most eye opening experience of my life. Only when I realized and accepted that I was powerless, and nothing I could say or do would make him stop drinking did my life take a turn for the better.
You are among friends here, please read the stickies at the top of the forum, lots of support will be found here.
Time to focus on you. Look forward to reading more of your posts.
Take care.