Hi and Welcome,
Congratulations on the birth of your child.
What really helped me in the early days was changing my routines to avoid usual triggers to drink. So, if 5pm is drinking time for you, make a change. Go to the gym or better yet, go home and spend time with your baby.
I understand what you mean about not allowing yourself to be happy. I grew up in a dysfunctional home and if I expressed happiness, there were negative consequences, always. So, I had to look deep within and connect with the spiritual part of myself and know that, yes, I did deserve a good life, a happy life. Everyone does.
