Having been raised with an alcoholic father (notice I say "with" and not "by" an alcoholic father), I STRONGLY recommend you do NOT have children with him. If you want to be obsessed with his drinking, be obsessed about finding out just what being raised in an alcoholic home does to children and the people they grow into. You can start by reading the two lists I posted yesterday here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post3520623
As for your obsession with BF's alcoholism, yes, that is normally what brings us here and to Al-Anon, an unhealthy, often paralyzing, frightening obsession with someone else's behavior, words, and actions. The long and short of it? Sick people will make you sick. To treat your obsession I recommend Al-Anon.
How to find a meeting in the US/Canada/Puerto Rico