Another mom here. My son started his addiction journey around age 13 and he's 29 now. I knew he was abusing drugs but when I learned it had progressed to heroin, I was angry, too. I remember angrily talking to him on the phone after I first found out about the heroin and asking him when he was going to realize he was way in over his head? Yes, I can relate to your pain.
It does get better, though, if you work on yourself. I know your thoughts and feelings right now are all about your son, but you must take yourself into consideration, too. When my husband and I discovered my son's addiction to heroin, I decided it was time for the two of us to speak to a therapist. This was one life experience we were not equipped to handle on our own. Addiction is not like anything else we had ever dealt with and so many people do what is not in the best interest of their addicted loved ones. It's not that our intentions are not good--they are--but addiction is a whole other ballgame with rules that don't resemble all the other rules of life. Here on this site is a good place to learn. Going to groups like Al or Nar-Anon are excellent sources of support. If you want to do what's best for your son, check out all the resources available to loved ones of addicts.