Originally Posted by
itsmylifenow 
He put the major guilt trip on me today. Said this wasn't our vacation but my vacation and I was just fitting him whenever it was convenient for me.
I feel the tension over this building inside me. I look forward to finally getting a vacation and this year I wish I didn't even have one.
You should tell him, yep that's correct! This is about YOU for once, not him. The way I see it, he fits you in whenever it's convenient for him (aka when you won't pose a threat to his self-destructive behaviors), so why shouldn't you do the same? At least yours will benefit you, not hurt you.
I always avoided making plans if I knew there was a chance I could be spending time with my BF instead. He didn't ask me to, and was never offended or pouty when I didn't include him. It wasn't even about worrying what he'd get himself into if I wasn't around. I just was so wrapped up in him that I always wanted to spend time with him if possible. He didn't do the same thing for me of course.
Anyway, my siblings and I are all pretty close, and my older sister moved from WA (about 2 hours away) to Texas about a month before I met my BF. She is my best friend and my niece and nephew are the light of my life, but even though I missed them I put off going to visit for so long.
I always used money or work as an excuse, but the truth is, I didn't want to leave my BF. I finally went to see her a few months ago (admittedly while he was working night shift so I wouldn't be seeing him anyway) and didn't even think of him the entire time! I'm going again next week. The stress and anxiety of the last 2 months have reached a point where I must get away. I can't wait. I really hope you get to do the same!!