Now's the time to sit on SR and/or call those AA numbers Dom - use all the support you have....you can get through this.
Wanting to drink to blot things out is understandable - you've had a terrible thing happen to you.
But don't add to that by doing something terrible to yourself.
None of us ever wake up the next day glad we drank.
Feelings can be terrible...but feelings are not who we are.
Don't add to the bad stuff.
D