thank you for the cycle graphic.... WOW, i have never 100% looked at it this way. It totally is abuse!
When we still lived together (i was a stay at home mom) i would go out in the afternoons to do something with my LO. Everytime i drove down our (loong windy) drive way i would almost not be able to breathe and my heart would pound. If he was supposed to be home at that time and his car was not there i was scared that he left us. If his car was there i was scared that he would be upset that i was not at home.... I have not thought of this in quite some time.
My heart goes out to all of you who have suffered "real" abuse! I could not imagine.... Thank you for being strong examples for all of us.