I really thought I was being honest with myself this time. I thought Iwas ready this time. I thought I had way more willpower than I really do. From what I've seen of myself I feel I have little or no willpower at all. Some part of me looks for any damn excuse to go out and drink and once that excuse is found I just end up doing what I always do. It hurts I thought I was better than this I really believed I could will my way past this but I can't. The repetition of this is what scares me most. It never changes my will always breaks down on the weekends. I am fine for the five days I work was able to quit drinking after work pretty good.But thursdays and fridays have been impossible. The only way I have suceeded is by keeping myself completely occupied with projects such as working on my car or something like that. Even then thats just to make time go by faster. Usually when I do strenuous work or work out or do anything to get the endorphins going I want to socialize afterwards and that means I go to the bar.