Thought I would update without starting a new thread.
We moved into our new place Monday. I feel very relaxed and my anxiety is very low which is a good feeling after the drama of the past few months. The kids love the house and seem calmer too. AH can only get ahold of me by email, and since I can preview the first few lines, I only read and answer the ones pertaining to mutual business like the sale of our home or the kids. I told him he could no longer use familiar pet names to refer to me, which was a big deal as his calling me that way made me feel vulnerable and like he was treading on a fragile boundary. Knowing he does not know where I am nor can he text or call is very liberating. A friend remarked that with everything I have been doing this week on top of work, which is exhausting, I look more relaxed than she has seen me in awhile. I feel stronger and more competent regarding my life than I have felt in a long time. AH wants his family back he told his mother, and that scares me because I feel like that means he will pressure me until I break or something, actually I don't know why it scares me. I have to remind myself daily that I am a free person and I am free to not be with him ever again if I choose. It's hard not o return to that placating, trapped mindset. I still can't believe what I have accomplished in so little time since my first post here, where I was so anxious, defeated and felt trapped. The common sense, no nonsense, sometimes in my face but also compassionate advice was the final catalyst I needed. I am by no means all fixed, just wanted ou all to know where I am a t today.