I myself have lived with an eating disorder for most of my life.
I met, feel in love with and married and alcoholic.
There is a difference between having an addiction and working your recovery. I am far from perfect, but for a long time now I have been blaming ALL of my relationship problems on my addiction, and not putting any faith into the fact that I was working recovery hard. My loved one not so much.
Working my own recovery was the most important thing to do for me, and honestly for him and a chance for us of a relationship.
Another thing that helped me with both my food stuff (I don't know why but it does) and definitely being in a relationship with an alcoholic is Al-Anon.
I have recently started to put the relationship into appropriate perspective (and what was mine and what was not). Food has really evened out and gotten better when I do that.