Sounds pretty similar to my life Husky
I was a musician - I slept days and worked nights - I also used alcohol for pain relief stress relief and as a coping mechanism for a variety of situations, stresses and upsets.
it wasn't that sobriety was impossible - just virtually impossible in practical terms the way I lived.
So...if I wanted to change I needed to change the way I lived...
thats not easy - but neither was the life I was living by the end.
D