I don't think anyone is saying it is completely your fault, but really, when it comes down to it, the only thing you have any control over is your owwn behavior and outlook. I have no good advice, as I am pretty introverted myself and really value my alone time, but if I find myself feeling lonely, I try and step out of my comfort zone and say yes to any invitation or new activity. Keep trying, it's a big city and there must be at least a few likeminded people out there!!