We went to couples counseling and eventually therapist told us that we needed individual therapy because we were not ready for couples. He said there was no way we could effectively do couples when my husband wasn't doing any internal work with regard to his alcoholism. I hated hearing that and especially being that because we were separated that was our only contact, but I understand it is for the better. He will never be good for me and I will never be good for him until he's working his recovery and until I am healed.