Originally Posted by
pinkdog 
Hi. I was struck by the statement "our home is neglected". Environment does matter. Since it sounds like you are still living there, invest some time and energy into fixing up the place. I think it is good for recovery. Best wishes to you friend.
This is one of my priorities. The past couple of years I've continued to work while my wife has neglected little things around the house to the point where I didn't have the desire to take up the slack. I was in a waiting game and I constantly was telling myself once she gets past this and finishes school, things will get better. The constant roller coaster caused me to basically become a spectator. Add money troubles and I felt stuck. No improvements made, things falling into disrepair, and clutter slowly taking over. Our home looked like a place where depressed people lived. With our separation, things have been moved and I'm left with the remains. I still have a house that can feel like a home, but there is a lot of things to be done. I'm excited about that and I know this is a key for me to improve many things about myself and my day-to-day life. Part of me is driven to do this to show her that I am pulling myself back up and getting back to living, but I know this has to be done for me. All of this sudden change makes me feel like my life was turned upside-down, or even over to a certain extent. I still feel crushed that all this happened, but I've committed to finding my way to a better me. I need to regain my identity and self-value.
I appreciate all the feedback and still have more to share....