Originally Posted by
effortjoy 
Where do you begin? There is so much I can't change because of the consequences of years of choices, so now what? If my whole day, my whole life- if I myself am the trigger- then how does recovery work? Can you not drink even when your whole life is a trigger ?
You can just decide to stop. It is that simple and yet an extremely difficult thing to do. Once the decision is made, you find tools to help you cope. Once you are sober a while you can look at your life and see what is really going on and try to mend what's broken. While I was drinking I could not evaluate my life in a rational way.
When we are drinking we are our own worst enemy. Alcohol can sabotage any glimmer of hope you are able to muster. Take out the alcohol and that hope is able to grow. It is a slow process, but since I have quit, I have never felt the pain and anguish that I felt my last day of drinking.
Best wishes effortjoy