Re-read and recommit
In light of your recent post about leaving AA, I think you should read your first blog post again, Gold, and try to recapture the committment you made to return to AA.
You'll never know if you'll find your way back here or to AA if moderation fails, or what bad things can happen with that decision to drink.
You also wrote a blog about your mom's drinking and how that affected you. I hope you think about what your decision to drink might do to your children.
Prayers out to you.