It seems like every oulet you mention in your post where you can find friends...You are not worthy of making a friendship. Self pity?....No self worth?...I was loaded with it. It's just one of the many forms of self that we deal with in AA by working the steps. If you haven't done that...I'd recommend you get a sponsor..Read and understand the Big Book...And work the steps....Friends will come along...Along with a lot of other wonderful things that come with being recovered. We come into AA to change our lives...The steps are how you do that.