I, like many others, made the promise to cut back many,many times. And I wouldn't do it because I could always find an excuse or impulse to drink more. To me, the issue of "alcoholic- am I or aren't I?" is irrelevant. Drinking was harming my life, damaging my relationships, keeping me from dealing with life's obstacles or enjoying its triumphs, and keeping me from living MY life as I hoped to live. Only get one shot at this. Once I made a decision that I would not drink ever again (big plan in AVRT words but I use all inspirations in recovery) it made it easier to focus my mind on what did make me happy and fulfilled around me. When I hang out with friends, I don't focus on a lost opportunity to drink or sorry for myself that I cant drink. I choose not to drink, yall! I focus on the chance to laugh with my friends, listen to music, enjoy the night sky, hold my boyfriends hand...all the things I didn't notice when I was impaired.
Also, I suggest finding some recovery help that speaks to you (AVRT, SR, AA, Smart, etc) to motivate, educate, and comfort you. For every person on here is a different path to sobriety. Congrats on taking the important first step in moving forward with your life.