I actually woke up this morning not hurting. It didn't take long for my mind to focus on the guilt again but I woke up not hurting. I am working through this whole situation. What has me really stuck is the fact that I apparently made a mistake in taking care of my brothers remains. I immediately called the mortuary that has dealt with my family alot here recently. Apparently people have been telling me that if I would have left him at the coroners office they would have helped me deal with him. But the mortuary cleaned my bubba up and let us touch him and say our goodbyes which the jail did not afford us this. he was found at 10:35 taken to a hospital and pronounced at 11:15 am we where not notified until noon. So we had to see him had to know it was real. but that single action cost me another 450 dollars. But well worth it. My sister in law slapped me into reality this am by saying "hey he is taken care of and the finances will work themselves out". I am trying not to focus on this but my mind just keeps going right back to it. I know my bubba would tell me not to worry about him to take care of myself and our Mom but I just thought more people would care enough about him to be able to donate a little bit. I am by no means mad at the mortuary they have gone above and beyond for us, they are not hounding us or even calling us it's just my own mind that has me stuck on that one detail. It will be ok and it will be paid but my mind has chosen to get stuck on this.