Wanted to expand upon my response.
I come from a dysfunctional family. My father was an alcoholic until the day he died. In my family of origin, we all knew EXACTLY what he needed to do in order to get sober. If he only just listened to us, everything would be fine.
Our codependency extended to each other too. I actually started looking into ACA meetings because I thought it might help my brother (lol).
There are many addicts and recovering addicts in my extended family. Whenever I ask a recovering addict what helped to get them sober they NEVER say someone else told them to go to a meeting, seek counseling, go to rehab, etc.
My uncle has been sober for 40 years. He told me he saw an old drinking buddy who looked great. He hadn't seen him in awhile and asked where he had been. His friend told him that he's been going to AA and hasn't been to a bar in six months. My uncle decided to go to AA because "he wanted what this other guy had". Another one of my cousins felt like he experienced a divine intervention when he was in the hospital after an alcohol related accident.
I truly think recovery has to come from within. You decide that you have had enough and search for help.
My own recovery started when I was having a mini-breakdown during work because I felt worthless, unloved, and a failure. I didn't know how I would ever feel better again. I called the counseling staff there and they told me to come right over. I started working with a wonderful therapist the following week.
I think I feel so strongly about this because on his death bed, my 70 year old father (who had been divorced from my mother for 35 years) said, "If your mother had stayed and tried to help me more maybe I would have stopped drink." Ha! It was actually so so sad that he never took responsibility for himself or his life.
So, if an addict asked me how to get help I could honestly say that I don't know. I might suggest that they google "alcoholism" and start making their own list.
BTW, I can sympathize with your desire to create this list.
I think a more appropriate list, for this forum, would be "what did you do to get yourself help from codependency".
Fondly,
db