Emmy,
Gee, I heard those exact same words last night from my A. I am controlling and overbearing. When I ask, "How?" so I can think of working it out through conversation I get no 'real' answer. The answer I get is basically that he wants to be able to do whatever he wants, when he wants without any consequences. Interpretation: He wants to drink and be left alone about it. Fine. I digress, really. He can drink every single day like he does and just be alone then. I am not by any means trying to degrade your issues when I say this, but I would BE HAPPY if my A only had an occasional binge. I wish I would have seen earlier that my A does have a serious problem with alcohol and I commend you on recognizing the problem a LOT earlier than I ever did. My A drinks every.single.day. Transforms into an emotionless angry man who directs his anger at me daily. Alcoholism is progressive. It doesn't fix itself or get better. It is so painful to watch someone in the throws of this disease but it is more painful to be affected so by it.
I am looking forward to moving in with my mom. At least she will help with my son, housework and not expect me to feed her so she can feed an addiction. Your story is inspirational and I am so glad to know others have treaded the path before I and found solace in a different way of life. I am BANKING on that.
CS