Dee..you guys are my support for now. I have tried AA and did not feel comfortable, but it might be worth another try. And Sapling....you hit the nail right on the head. Logically it doesn't make sense that he triggers me to drink because he knows I have a problem and have never drank with him. But I often hid it. He is definatley a trigger for me to not only drink, but lose my perspective. So, I know I need to let go.
Thanks for the support, I really, really need it right now...tough nite all around.