Thank you everyone! I am so glad I found this place, it has provided me with an immeasurable amount of support.
Zebra, I am pretty much 'white knuckling' so far. I haven't found anything that I feel is right for me. I really should try to get to AA, but I don't believe in the whole higher power thing, so I am not sure it would really help. I have been seeing a counselor for the last 3 years, but seeing her has not helped with the drinking. She has helped me in so many other ways, mainly issues with my marriage, but I think I need to find someone know who can help me with sobriety.
Thanks again for all the support.